Leaping Off the Wagon

Let me guess, you haven't had IT in X amount of days/weeks/months/years/decades. You know what IT is. IT is you favorite food that you have banished from your diet for reasons ranging from social responsibly to health. IT can be fast food, meat, milk, cheese, pizza, chocolate, cake, cookies, Milanos, candy, pie, bread, beer, a burger, a cheeseburger, a bacon cheeseburger, a bacon cheeseburger rimmed pizza, hot wings,  a bacon cheeseburger rimmed pizza topped with hot wings, a cinnabon, ice cream, biscuits and gravy, friend chicken, bacon wrapped anything, mac n' cheese, ribs, french fries, cheese fries, chili fries, chili cheese fries, brownies, fudge brownies, double fudge brownies, or insert unhealthy edible disaster here.  Yet when you see IT you still weep a bit deep in your healthy, yet slightly begrudged soul. At some point, you will ask yourself, "why shouldn't I have a bite?"... I think you should.

First off, lifelong deprivation is no one's idea of a good time. If you really love a particular/specific food that you have placed on your "No List" and you haven't found a decent substitute, then you might want to consider letting yourself have IT once in a while. I was an ice cream junkie, but I am really satisfied by coconut milk ice cream. It has the flavor and mouth feel that works for me. However, nothing can mimic a Duncan Hines brownie made with eggs and oil and a box of chemicals. That fudgie square of heaven just cannot be made in the sugar free, wheat free world in which I live. I don't buy the mix and I hide from dessert tables. 

Second, you have got to bloom where you are planted. If you already have an extensive and informed "No List", I bet you already get a fair amount of bullshit from your friends when you go out to eat or pull out your nuts and apples at a gathering. If you are in New Orleans and want a beignet, have one. When faced with a rare and/or local delicacy, participate.  If Nonna is making homemade manicotti, have some. Just don't gorge on it and try to get some fruits and veggies in you at the next meal. 

Holidays are not reasons to over indulge. In the US celebration food has, for the most part, become easily obtainable. Turkey and stuffing, pies, cake, roast beef, etc can be found at any restaurant. These foods are no longer special occasion foods, unless Tuesday is now a special occasion. If you are going to go for IT, make IT something you really enjoy. 

Third, I am betting, from personal experience, that if you haven't had IT in a month or so, chances are you are going to be very uncomfortable when you have it. This past weekend I had wheat for the first time in 6 months. I promise you, I won't do that again anytime soon. But, that biscuit top was delicious. I am terrified of eating dairy. I haven't had it for a very long time and I have convinced myself that one trace of brie will wreck me.

Once you decide to have IT. Enjoy IT. Don't obsess about IT. Don't feel guilty about IT. You had IT and at some point you'll have IT again. 

I guess what I am trying to say is indulging once in a while is ok. Give yourself permission to be human. Just remember to keep treat foods from becoming trite foods. 

Just One Word... Plastics

http://youtu.be/CsrLHP26zvk

Bisphenol A (a.k.a. BPA) is an industrial chemical used to make plastics and resins. It is classified as an endocrine disruptor. Basically, when you are exposed to it, it can mimic estrogen in the body and screw with your hormones. We are exposed to this every time we use eat foods that were canned in cans that were lined with BPA or stored in plastic containers made with BPA and drink liquids from bottles made with BPA.  It can also get into our system through water pipes and dental sealants. Most surprisingly, it is added to thermal paper and you can get it into your system when handling receipts! Seriously? Contamination via receipts?! 

So, why should you give a shit if there's a scootch more estrogen in your diet? I'm on the pill and have been for almost 15 years, I pay for extra estrogen... well, taking additional hormones should be personally researched and discussed with a doctor, not snuck into your leftovers. And, I'm sure my husband doesn't welcome the idea of Gladware induced bitch tits. BPA has also been linked to cancer, brain tumors and insulin resistance. Bitch tits and a tumor... bonus!

So, BPA = bad. Where is it and how can it be avoided, you say? BPA is found in plastic food containers often marked on the bottom with the letters "PC" recycling label #7. Plastics with the recycling labels #1, #2 and #4 on the bottom are safer choices and do not contain BPA. However, I still think heating or freezing in plastic is a bad idea. 


This week i dumped all my plastic containers into the recycle bin and invested in glass Pyrex containers. They do have plastic lids, but I do not put them in the microwave. I had reservations about commuting into work with glass, but I haven't had any breakage issues and everything tastes just a bit better.

I do still use some plastic cling wrap and freezer bags, but I'm working towards eliminating as much as I can. One drop at a time, right?

This Little Piggy is going to Market!

I read Michael Pollen's In Defense of Food. It was a good book. I think, it made some very valid points. One such point encouraged either growing a garden or consuming local organic produce. I'm not really a garden kinda girl.  So, all hail the internet! There was a service in my area that offered online ordering of organic locally grown goods and residential delivery. Lazy AND organic... was I a hipster wanna be?


I ordered a summer vegetable package with a supplemental fruit bundle all for the bargain price of $75 not including delivery and packaging fees (the use of a cooler). Ridiculously expensive? Yes! But, Pollen also points out, in his book, that the demand for cheap food is what brought us to this sorry state of food affairs. Also, I was under the illusion that, not unlike fruit of the month, I was going to have so much produce my kitchen would be over flowing. 


It amazed me how little $75 will get you. I received my order on Friday, it's Monday and I'm almost out. Here's what I received: 2 pints of blueberries, 1 pint of blackberries, 8 mini Apricots, 14 tiny plums, 2 cucumbers, 1 incredibly bitter head of red leaf lettuce, 6 Chinese eggplants, 3 round zucchini, 3 patty pan squash, 12 very small yellow yukon potatoes, 2 tiny heads of purple cauliflower, 2 tiny heads of white cauliflower, 5 ears of corn, 6 tiny spring onions, 3 heads of pak choi, 1 bundle of dill, some string beans and 1 pint of josta berries. It's a nice list, but one I could have easily paid under $45 for at the supermarket, if I bought non organic. 

My cooler of produce

You do not get to choose what you get, which is exciting and, at these prices, scary. If you get something you aren't used to cooking and you ruin it, you feel terrible. 


For example, I over steamed the 3 heads of pak choi. It smelled awful. I threw it out. 


I had so much stone fruit that was too tart to eat; I made a very tart fruit tart. 


I pickled the cucumbers with the dill and some apple cider vinegar. 


I roasted everything I could: cauliflowers, zucchini, onions, potatoes, corn and eggplants. I was frantic to prep everything I could to ensure it would be eaten.


I tried to eat the lettuce, but it was so bitter I couldn't get it down. 


I have no idea what to do with the josta berries, they taste very weird. Before, I would have cooked them with pork. 


I must say, most of the produce was incredibly delicious. I will try this again in the fall. But, for now, I think I will be scoping out local farmer's markets. They are only open 7AM to 12PM on Saturdays, but it just might save my wallet and my health. 

I Beat my Meat

It has been 23 days since I stopped eating meat. I did not make a conscious effort to be a vegetarian. One Saturday, I was grocery shopping and I had no desire to put a single piece of meat in my cart or my mouth.

A phrase, from a book I hated, Skinny Bitch (thanks Tara), kept repeating in my head, when you eat meat,"you are eating fear, rage and grief". Simply put, animals feel fear, rage and grief before slaughter and when you eat those animals you eat the chemical reactions to their fear, rage and grief... It just stuck with me.

I thought, if I can understand the meat processing process, it would give some validity to my decision one way or another. I am not one of those "nothing with a face" kind of people. I love meat. I hate E.coli. I don't want to ingest antibiotics, steroids and/or synthetic hormones through my food. If the animals were feed well (with the correct feed), cared for properly, killed humanely and processed in sanitary conditions; I would eat meat. But, they aren't. So I don't. 

I am not going to lecture anyone, but I'm open to discussion. If you really wanted to know more about meat processing practices in the US, you'd Google it. 

I still eat fish and cage free eggs when possible. I am sure that if I researched those industries, I would stop eating that as well, but don't eat dairy or flour and limit processed sugar and I'm running out of foods. Nuts and beans will only take you so far. I refuse to eat faux meats. I think they are worse for your body than meat. GMO soy and salt is not my idea of healthy eating.


I would love to tell you that over the past three weeks I have felt euphoric and full of energy, but I'm really just me. I still skip the gym. I still have sinus and knee problems, though my sinus issues are less severe. 


If I want it badly enough, I'll eat it, no matter what it is... the significant word here is want. 

Yeast: The Sugar Beast

I wish I could tell you that one day I woke up, looked at my size 20 pants, shrieked in anguished horror and never touched a cookie ever again, but that's not how it happened.

Here is what really happened... I was contemplating purchasing size 22 pants when a beloved family member  said, "You know diabetes runs in our family. A bunch of your relatives have lost toes and feet." I thought about how much losing a foot would impact my spouse's life. Just 4 years ago, when we got married, he promised to love me in sickness and in health, but didn't I have a responsibility to try to stay healthy to care for him? Yes. Especially, if I was facing something I could prevent.

The threat of diabetes terrified me - increased mobility is necessary for shoe shopping. Who cares if you only have to buy one fabulous shoe if it's going next to a stump! Especially if it's a stump with a bad story! If you only get to wear one Louboutin because of a shark attack - awesome. If it is due to a snack attack - lame. So, I moved more, ate less and lost 60 pounds. 


Shortly after that, I was selected to participate in a weight loss contest where I was given access to a trainer and a nutritionist. I lost another 20 pounds. 


After the contest I joined a roller derby team and dropped another 15 pounds. Then I got injured and gained it back. I stayed at 185 pounds for a long time. It seemed my weight-loss waves had ebbed.

In December 2011 I saw a nutritionist, she ordered a complete blood panel. My results concluded that I was healthy. Just one issue, my level of inflammation- it was off the charts. Since none of my other levels indicated disease or cancer, the nutritionist suggested a Candida diet for 6 months- http://www.thecandidadiet.com/.


Candida is a condition caused by too much yeast in the body. In cases of people with a compromised immune system, it can present as oral thrush or yeast infections in the body and on the skin. I did not suffer any of those symptoms (read: my vagina was/is just fine). However, I did have terrible sinuses and was easily tired. Please note: there is no conclusive test for Candida. My GP told me I was crazy to try this diet. 

Sugar feeds yeast. In order to reduce the amount of yeast in your body, you must stop taking in new yeast and starve the yeast already in your system. The diet is very limiting, it excludes all yeast, starchy vegetables, fermented foods, sugar, wheat, corn, oats, alcohol, cheese and most fruits. 


As of July 23rd, I will have been following this diet for 6 months. I have not been very strict. I do eat fruit. I do have some fermented foods. I do eat dark chocolate (lots and lots of dark chocolate). After 5 1/2 months of not eating baked goods, processed foods (because the most of them contain flour, sugar, corn or all of the above) or dairy, I do feel better. Not cured, but better. My quality of sleep is better, I haven't been sick and I have more energy. I will continue with most aspects of this diet, mainly because eating too much sugar or corn or potatoes makes me feel really sick. I full intend to slowly add back oats, dried fruit and alcohol. 

I am sharing this with you, because, despite my previous attempts at weight loss, this has been the only course of action that has gotten my weight down this far and almost to a "normal" range. Currently, I am considered overweight for someone my height, but only by 3 pounds. So far my total weight loss since 2008 is 103 pounds. Thirty of those pounds have been lost in the past 6 months. I don't attribute this weight loss to beating Candida. I attribute it to the absence of processed foods, dairy products and a reduction in sugar intake.

I still have about 7- 12 pounds to go, but I am doing the best I can. 

"I will (try to) be a hummingbird"

In the 2009 documentary Dirt! The Movie, Wangari Maathai narrated a fable about a group of animals who witness a fire in their forest. All of the animals watch in horror as their home is being destroyed. None of the animals do anything to save their home except for the tiny hummingbird. The hummingbird carries drops of water, one at a time, and tries to put out the fire. All the other, much bigger, animals try to discourage the hummingbird, "you'll never put that fire out one drop of water at a time". The hummingbird replies, "I am doing the best I can". (watch it here: http://youtu.be/IGMW6YWjMxw )

That's it. That is the message. You have a choice, you can watch the things going on around you and do nothing or you can do something. If you chose to do something, you may not succeed in putting out the fire. You may not win the battle. You can only do your best. 

I am choosing to take some small steps to be a healthier person, lessen my "footprint" on my environment and not to become a preachy bitch about any of it. That "don't be a preachy bitch" bit is my favorite piece of the hummingbird fable. At no point does the hummingbird stare down her beak at the elephant and say, "hey hose-nose, get off your ass and start sucking and spraying" she just answers their discouragements with "I am doing the best I can". So simple, so high road, so not my usual MO.

My hummingbird attempts, so far:

Over the past 4 years I have lost about 100 pounds. At my heaviest I clocked in at 260 pounds and currently, I am fighting my way into the mid 150 pound range. I am consistently trying to eat healthier. I have cut out all flour, most sugar, all dairy, and meat with the exception of eggs and fish. When I buy meat for my spouse, I try to make sure it is grass fed, free range, antibiotic free and organic. I am still trying to verify the true meanings of those labels and how much of a difference they make.

I try to exercise most days of the week. I bike, pole dance, skate with my beloved roller derby league (sadly, I don't play due to a knee injury) and I have a membership to a local gym gathering a film of summer neglect on my key chain.

I have just found a Community Sourced Agriculture (CSA) supplier in my area and I expect my first delivery this week. Not only with this bring fresh organic produce to my door, but it will patronize local farms. It is not cheap. I can not commit to this weekly, but I can try to use this method twice per month.

I am going to try sprouting seeds. It is very inexpensive and a relatively healthy way to supplement my salad habit.


I am going to try to use more glass and less plastic materials for food preparation and storage. Additionally, I will try to purchase foods that are not packaged with plastic, and, if they are plastic, I will try to recycle that plastic.


That's a lot of trying. I hope it leads to lots of succeeding. In any case, I will do best I can.